December

I gotta just write somewhere before I go crazy. Lots to do, lots to do, and LOTS TO DO.

Every day I wake up running from dreams where I get nothing completed, I start the day with a furiously pounding heart, I brave the day bearing the weights of the dreams that I promised to make come true....and every night, I go to bed with the feeling that I should be typing more proposals, doing more presentations instead of resting.

I need a rest. I can never rest.

At some point of life, you will blame luck for everything. This is not a good stage of life.

Hi Bonita, I am/you are back.

I was on the verge of closing this blog down forever. If it's not continued, I would rather make it a clean blank page.

And then I read my last post with the pictures of my growing belly during pregnancy. And the last last post about putting weight. And then on and on. This is a 10 years old blog, oh my. I stopped writing diaries ever since I've moved in with The Man, it is too hard to pen down anything close to your heart when you know all the drawers will be opened (locked or unlocked) and all letters will be read (stamped confidential or not). Ah well. WELL.

Daken's coming one years old in 2 weeks time. Yeah, that lump from my body that was deposited into a living human being. I went through alot post-pregnancy. ALOT is an understatement really.

So fucking cute. Baby I know.

Speaking of babies, I'm glad that one of the sisters is finally pregnant. Enough of prep-talk with those who are not even married, I need someone to complain to about the prices of milk powder, waking up in the middle of the night to feed, education conflicts with the MIL and a respond with a roll-eye-I-know-this-feeling-too someone.

**

Agency turns 2 this month! I'm supposed to get the anniversary thank you gifts settled. Supposed to.

Hey boy its time to get moving.

Its 26th November, and the baby's still comfortably swimming inside. 39 weeks and 2 days.

I'm still very awed by how much my belly has stretched to contain this little life within me. Life within life --- everytime I think of this, its still scaring me a little. This little thing that started from less than a thumb is now bigger than my palm, and it's moving, it's growing, it's eavesdropping on my everyday conversations...okay I should stop using the word "it". I mean he. And on top of this all, it still amazes me how my intestine and organs are still intact and very much operating. Whoever made mankind is certainly a genius.

4 months

7 months

7 and a half months

8 and a half months

9 months

Full term

How to find your true love

1. Know what you want
2. Find The One
3. Convince him that you're The One


Done.

Pregnancy brains

I'm not the kind of pregnant woman who can tell you how many weeks I've been pregnant. Everytime somebody ask me about it I would say "Around 3 months plus?". I really got no idea.

Hate making excuses for myself but seriously this pregnancy is chewing my brain cells. Some time back I posted on facebook about baby due in 5 months, and the gang-who-knew (in general, the people who knew I was pregnant before the official announcement) texted me, "Aren't you due in December?" And I was like, "Yeah." And then I tried working out the maths again : December minus May = 5 months. I was finally convinced that I made a calculation mistake after the fourth friend's text.

And I screwed up my appointments, castings included. The worst thing is no matter how hard I try to remember things, they never stay. So nowadays I insist that people just contact me via whatsapp, facebook and emails instead of ringing me --- at least there's something for me to track back.

And I

And that is, all I wanted.
=)

I forgot how powerful I used to be

When I was ten, I told myself that when I grow up, I'm never going to underestimate what a ten year old kid can do, how much a ten year old could understand and how powerful a ten year old could be.

Along the way to growing up I forgot all about it. And here I am, many many years from the day I said that, reminded by a fellow Capricorn girl : "There's alot in our world."

I remember that now.

Hello 2013

I do miss the days.
But, life goes on.

**
2013 means alot to me. It means striking off things that has not been completed in my past yearsssss' resolution. How exciting.